Here are a couple of random musings from the day:
- I was running on the treadmill (okay, running might be an overstatement...jogging? yes, jogging), something that cannot be done without music. Picture original Aerosmith, 90's alternative, vintage REO Speedwagon, Kings of Leon, and this: Jason Mraz's "If It Kills Me." Man, there is something so pure and honest about this song - his voice, the melody; it floors me every time I hear it. And what a marvelous thing music is, isn't it? It's like magic: the way it transports you, immediately and with preamble, to an event, to a person, no matter how many years have passed; the way it instantly makes everything you've ever wanted or needed feel like it's attainable; the way it deposits you in a great place emotionally, makes you feel that all is right with the world.
- Authentic living: I like how this sounds, like the deeper meaning and implications. But. Does living one's life authentically mean sharing all the awful/traumatic/embarrassing/emotional/overwhelming doings of your life with everyone in a preemptive strike sort of way? Does it mean sharing these things only when asked? Perhaps it's a combination of the two - finding a way to be real and open, a way to speak one's truth with grace.
Your musings strike a deep chord, both on how music transports and transcends (what a great gift it is) and regarding authentic living. The latter is difficult for me. I grapple with how much to reveal of myself and my past experiences. Where and when is it safe to do so? Where and when is it important to my sense of self and identity and recovery to do so? Who needs to know what about me? What do I need people to know about me? I'm not sure I'll ever find resolution, but I think it's important I keep trying to shed some light, to find some resolution, to it all ...
ReplyDeleteEthel - yes! These are the things I wrestle with, too, and I get weary from trying to "manage" parts and pieces. Seems that living authentically is in some ways about releasing fear of judgment...
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